Beginning, Leaving, Returning
by Freyia
Summary: Fate forced herself to leave the life she had and the people she cherished, for an inexcusable act, only to returned home with a surprise. NanoFate
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

**Surprised?**

It had been 2 months since Fate last entered her office. It haven't changed all at, nothing has changed. How awfully long those 2 months were, with emotional conflicts and suffers. She could have returned earlier, when her first was completed. But no, she had to accept another one. She really wanted to return home, return to Nanoha and return to Vivio.

_Nanoha._

Truth is, she didn't know how to face her. She felt abhorrence to no others but herself. Just by looking at herself in the mirror, she felt disgusted. She though 2 months of nothing but battles would be enough. Enough to calm her mind and ease her soul, but it didn't.

_Nanoha._

_Guilt._

She never realized how much she loved her, not until she lost her self-control and ruined what they had together.

A soft knock on the door interrupted Fate's chain of thought. "Come in"

The door slowly creak open, as if one's hesitated from entering. Swallowed hard, the brunette enter the room completely closing the door behind her. "Fate-chan" she said softly, hardly audible.

Eyes fixed on each other, none move or speak. They miss each other, long for each other, yet won't tell each other. Afraid. Yes, they're afraid of rejection, of ruining the only thing they have. Friendship.

_But hasn't it already been ruined?_

"Nanoha" Fate doesn't know when and how her body crossed the room, standing right in front of the brunette.

"Fate..." Nanoha looked down before continuing. "I have something to tell you."

_She must not want me back,_ Fate thought. _Of course, who would I want me after..._

"I'm pregnant..."

"Congratulat ...." Eyes widen, respiration stopped "ion".

_Nanoha is pregnant. _

_Pregnant.._

Fate felt pain when reality hit. A kind of pain that even physical injuries can't compete. She felt empty, dead, just like a standing zombie.

Have Nanoha been dating? With whom? Yuuno? Was she the last to know?

Fingers formed into fist. Blood started to boil. Yes, Fate is possessive. "With who?" she said, trying to sound as calm as possible.

"I.." Nanoha bit her lower lip. "I...don't know." She tried. She tried to hold back the tears but she wasn't able to. Wrapping her arms around Fate's waist, she used the shoulder for head cushion. _This warmth_. She misses it. She misses Fate. But she also hated Fate for leaving, hated herself for allowing Fate to leave. "I don't know Fate-chan" she repeated, sobbing louder.

Fate was speechless. Doesn't know who the father is?!? How was that possible...unless...unless Nanoha had been with more than one man.

"I haven't slept with anyone" Nanoha said, still clinging onto Fate.

Fate arched an eyebrow. _How is that even possible? _She might be a clone, but she understood full well on conception. "Then how....?"

"I don't know. I..."she said in between sobs. "I started vomiting almost every morning for the past few weeks. I thought it was for I was sick, so I took a break and use it as a vacation to go visit my family with Vivio. Mama saw my symptoms and said I might be pregnant, but I laughed it off." Fists clenched tight onto Fate's blouse, as she dug her nose deeper into Fate's neck. She was scared. Scared of what Fate might think. Even though she's a mage, she's still a human and humans' body doesn't work like way. Would Fate leave her now? Would Fate be disgusted with her? Those thoughts haunted her. It's slowly killing her inside.

"Mama bought home a pregnancy test..." she tried to continue. "and...and it came out positive.." she sobbed louder.

Fate was still speechless.

_Pregnant._

_No man._

"Are you sure Nanoha? Try to remember. You haven't slept with anyone at all?" Fate spoke softly.

"Well, I did...." her voice was as low as a whisper. "2 months ago...on the night of the celebration for the lightning team's first completed mission. With..."

_2 months ago...Party. Celebration. Completed mission._

"_Not drinking tonight Testarossa?" The pink hair knight asked, occupying the stool on Fate's right._

_It was a celebration on the lightning team's first completed mission. Everyone did a wonderful job, therefore Hayate decided to relax for the night. "No, I have to drive later and tuck Vivio in for bed."_

"_Who are you kidding? The last time we went drinking, you drove home wasted." Signum smirked. _

"_Quit persuading Fate to drink, Signum. Fate can't have any alcohol until she finishes her last set of antibiotics" Shamal said, walking up from behind. "I'll personally punish you if she does drink" she winked seductively at the pink-hair knight, causing her to blush._

_Fate shivered. She caught the wink. Internally smirking at Signum. A proud knight, who refused to lose, refused to give up is being dominated by no other than Shamal, herself. Poor Signum. _

_Yet Fate envied them. Their relationship. Signum won't admit it, Shamal won't deny it. _

_She felt empty yet she can't come up with any reasons. Perhaps, she also wanted to love and be loved in return. Her gaze landed on a brunette who are drowning down every bit of alcohol in a game of card. God, Nanoha must have sucked at it because it's her 7__th__ bottles already. _

_Fate smiled. Thinking, seeing Nanoha warms her heart. Her smiles, her eyes, and her touch. Sometimes she wondered, what will happen if Nanoha decided to get marry? What will happen to Fate? _

_As time passed, bottles were laid empty, bodies were scattered. The only people who were capable of walking straight, minds clear are Fate, Signum, and Shamal. And only them, who can transport others home._

"_You...know...hiccup..Fate-chan...hiccup. T-that was...fun" The totally wasted girl spoke incoherently, as Fate placed her down onto their shared bed. "You...should have hiccup...play. Yunno....cheated."_

_Fate smiled. It was nice seeing Nanoha relaxed. With all those battles, enemies, and missions, Nanoha overworked herself like always. "Sleep well." Tugging Nanoha, she placed a lingering kiss on her forehead. "my love...."_

_With that done, Fate pulled out her set of antibiotic, she'd received earlier this morning from Shamal. She haven't noticed that the color wasn't the same as those she had took before popping it in her mouth.. Little did she know that her life will change after it's effect._

"you.." Nanoha mumbled.

Mouth opened, jaw dropped.

_What the hell....?_

_How?_

"Fate-chan...?"

_Placing her hand on her head, Fate slowly stirred in bed. Pain. Throbbing pain. Major headache. Her body felt heavy as if...as if something, someone squishing her. Her hand felt something soft, something warm. She wondered what it was. Giving it a squeezed, she heard a light moan and a soft mumble. Someone mumbled her name._

_Instantly her eyes flew opened and hand releasing that soft texture. She scanned her surroundings. In her room. On her bed. _

"_Fate-chan" she heard a soft mumble again._

_Her face turned white looking where the voices came from. Nanoha was litterally laying on top of her. Naked nonetheless, revealing some red marks on visible skin. She had no clue what happened lastnight. She couldn't think. She couldn't comprehend with anything. Did she forced herself onto Nanoha lastnight? Have she lost control and acted on her deepest desire? So many thoughts._

_Her hand...she just groped Nanoha's butt._

_Guilt._

_Nanoha slowly opened her eyes. Pain. Hang over. Just what she needed. But she also felt soreness. Soreness located between her legs. Pushing herself up from whatever cushion is underneath, blue eyes locked with burgundy. She shifted her gaze from Fate's face down to her breasts, then back to her face repeatedly. _

_Finally realization hit hard on the head, she jumped off the bed dragging the blanket with her, leaving the fully exposed Fate vulnerable. _

_Guilt. It stabbed her hard. She took advantaged of Nanoha, when she was least defensive. _

_Monster._

"Fate-chan?"

"Have you went to Shamal?"Fate asked, still confused.

_It is even possible? Possible for two females to concept?_

"No. I'm scared Fate-chan." Nanoha spoke softly.

"It's okay Nanoha. Everything will be okay." Fate reassured her. "We'll go see Shamal."

A/N:

I must admit, I suck at writing angst.

This idea popped out of no where today while I was studying for my exam so I chart it down to empty my head. Grammar might be a bit off. Couldn't think of any good title. Hope you guys enjoy it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**Evil Shamal**

Silence.

Signum's here again, bruised and injured. Her mission was a success, but she didn't return unscarred. Shamal knew nothing can be done. Both are guardians. They live for Hayate and will gladly die for Hayate. Responsibility. Yet deep down, she wanted to be selfish.

Their love grew from mutual trust and silent understanding. At first, it was fun, it was excited, and it was warm. Decades later, it had fully bloomed into something that causes pain. Pain of watching life-threaten events.

This silence, she was once used to, is currently irritating her.

Sigh.

"I'm okay…" Signum spoke in a soft reassurance voice. A voice that only spoken to her. She knew what Shamal is thinking, but has a knight, a guardian, it's her job to obey her mistress's order even if it cost her life. It's her job to protect Hayate, not only as a guardian but as a friend and family.

"I'll always return t-" her voice was cut off when a soft pair of lips captured her into a chaste kiss. She misses it; the warmth of Shamal's touch and heat that radiates from her body.

"Shamal" she heard her name in the distance followed by nearing steps.

Shamal growled inwardly. Interrupted!

"We'll continue this tonight." She whispered softly before pulling back, sending shivers down the pink-hair knight's spine as a tin blush crept onto her cheeks.

"Shamal" the voice called again, now standing right outside the medical lab.

"Come in Fate-san."

The door quickly opened as Fate stepped in, pulling the hesitance Nanoha along. She was scared, Fate noticed, for the increased intensity of the grip from her hand.

"Are you hurt?" Shamal asked, scanning the couple. From what is present to her, Fate seems fine. No visible physical injuries, great balance, and normal gait. Nanoha seems hesitance with no injuries. "Are you not feeling well?" She rephrased her question. As much as she adores this couple, they better come with a valid reason for interrupting her fun.

"Well….?"

After some hesitation and with Fate's encouragement, Nanoha finally decided to walk up to Shamal. She wasn't emotionally prepared, not for this, not for pregnancy. After all, she's only 21.

"I'm pregnant…"

_Eh_, was the quickest uncharacteristic respond from Signum.

Speechless, both Shamal and Signum stared. Never once have they heard of Nanoha being romantically involved, then again, neither of them have stalked her.

"Congratulation Nanoha-san." Shamal asked with enthusiasm, once recovered from the surprised. "How many months are you?"

"I'm not sure. 2 months?" Nanoha responded doubtfully.

Draping a white sheet over a small bed, she signaled Nanoha to sit. "Well, we can figure that out." Curiously, she wanted to ask who, yet knowing that it isn't proper to ask. It is after all, not her business.

"Who's the father?" Blunt as ever, Signum asked. As much as she wanted to be happy for Nanoha, she couldn't. Not when she knew her sparring partner is suffering. Even though, the topic was never covered, she was not as dense as Shamal think. She knew how Fate felt, everyone besides Nanoha knew. _Idiots._

"With…Fate"

_What the hell..,_ Signum choked on her own thought.

_What the…_Shamal turned her attention to Fate, who stood there awkwardly. If she remembered correctly, Fate had nothing dangling when they all took baths together. _Or did she hid…_Eyes glued to the area between Fate's legs. _Could she be a hem…_

"I'm not!" Fate snapped, using both hands to cover her groin area, as if reading Shamal's mind.

_How…it is possible. Unless…the pill…_ "Fate, have you ever taken an oval pink tablet from here 2 months ago?" Shamal was positive now. That pill suddenly disappeared 2 months ago without a trait. _If it is…then it worked!_ A smile crept up at the thought.

"Yeah…that antibiotic?" Fate answered, questionably.

"Your antibiotic was pink…but not oval." Shamal is happy. Very happy. Who knew her experiment would work. She had spent years and years, researching and testing for a way to conceive a child without the need of a man. Happy, for it finally paid off.

"Then…?" Somehow, Fate didn't like the look on Shamal's face. It's dangerously scary.

"I called it, the Female Sperm pill."

_What the fuck…_was the only unspoken thoughts of the remaining three.

"I've no clue how you mistakenly took that pill instead of the antibiotic." She continued. "You see, in order for a female to produce sperm, they need the Y chromosome. I'd used the technique called microcell-mediated chromosome transfer, chemically breaking up the chromosome into microcells, that is, containing 1 chromosome. Then I used the cell sorting techniques, isolating the X and Y to fuse it with separate cells. Normal male have one active X chromosome, so in order to match the activity level, I added testosterone hormones to inactivate one X chromosome and to nourish the sperm. " Shamal stopped.

Silence.

"English?" Nanoha might be smart, might have finished school, but still had no clue what Shamal just said.

"To put it simple, I injected the Y chromosome and testosterone into an artificial cell, fusing it into that pill. However, just like any normal sperms, it cannot survive in contact with air for a long period of time so it's nearly impossible for fertilization unless…" _unless it's used with my latest toy invention_ "And the possibility is only 1/100…" _But then, how was the sperm transferred from Fate to Nanoha without it dying or losing its effective, unless the conversion allowed it to endure the room temperate longer….yet still doesn't explain the immigration. Unless…they have their own toy? _

Fate wasn't sure if she should be happy or guilty. So the baby is hers. She's the..father? mother? But it will ruined Nanoha's future. How will Nanoha face others? She's not even married!

_Marriage…_

"Though I'm quite curious as to what you've done in order to make it-"

"Why did you make that pill?" Fate suddenly cut in, uncomfortable with where Shamal was leading.

Disappointed, however, it didn't stop the corner of Shamal's lips from curving up into a smile, as her eyes stared directly at Signum.

Signum swallowed hard. _Oh shit_, she inwardly cursed. She didn't like that look at all. Not one bit.

A/N:

Somehow, I didn't quite like this chapter much. It seems so blah to me, yet I don't know what I can do to improve it. I think my brain cells are slowing deceasing.

I semi-bs on the explanation of the pill, though it is not completely all false.

Credited to www[dot]samesexprocreation[dot]com.

As for how the sperm travels from one person to another, I might explain it later on if some interesting idea pops up. If not, use your imagination, considering I want this story to stay as rated T.

Have to give Shamal and Signum some loving. I just happen to love them also.

Enjoy!


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

4 weeks had passed since the great news was spread. No one questioned. No one dared to question, at least not from the Aces, themselves. No one seems surprised, as if it was a normal thing. Everyone had witnessed; their love was too obvious, even to the outsiders. It's like a trend. If Nanoha smiles, Fate would also smile. If Fate cries, Nanoha would join her. They're just too clouded to see the love they both shared.

Some of which didn't care, but they were happy. Happy that the White Devil had found a target, to release them from hell, especially Hayate.

Mood swing.

Training fields were wrecked and soldiers were in and out of the infirmary on daily basis. Perhaps, Fate's present would ease Nanoha's mood, Hayate thought, therefore Fate was summoned.

Little did they know, it was the effect of pregnancy that started all the chaos, however, Hayate didn't regret. At least, Fate would be the only one to visit the infirmary on daily basis.

She had witnessed first-handed what the emotionally unstable White Devil have done, and she thanked to all the deities above that Nanoha was forced on maternity leave. Magic can inflict great damage to both the mother and the fetus, Shamal said, so it is a must. Of course that didn't sit too well with Nanoha, but after a few cuts and bruises Fate had suffered, Nanoha had finally agreed.

Everyone pray for Fate, for her to survive throughout Nanoha's pregnancy.

"This won't feel uncomfortable one bit, Nanoha-san. So relax." Shamal reassured her, as she attached colorful wires to Nanoha's exposed abdomen. "This machine is used to check the fetal heart rate."

Since this was Shamal's experiment, she was especially concerned. Yes, it worked, but she hadn't fully acknowledged the complications and side effects. It was an incomplete experiment after all.

Though, she knew one thing for sure; Fate doesn't remember anything of that night. Perhaps it's the side effect of the pill, leaving an empty gap in one's memory when activated. Fate had blamed herself for forcing Nanoha into it yet Shamal knew Fate's self control was one of Fate's most proud traits. Was it also the effect of the medication, making one acts on its desire? So many un-answered questions and Shamal is determined to acquire all data.

"Ne, Nanoha-san. If you don't mind me asking, what happened that night?" Shamal started. Nanoha was her only chance, since Fate can't recall. "I want to see if there were any side effects or any differences in Fate's behavior after consuming that pill. I have tried asking her but she just blushed and ran away."

Nanoha chuckled. Fate was never easy to talk to, in that field, anyway.

_Stirring slightly in the state of toxicity, Nanoha somehow managed to hear loud heart beats, pounding right next to her ear. Slowly opening her eyes, she took in her surroundings. The room was dark, with the moon being her only source of light. She was home, in her bedroom, on her bed, clinging tightly onto Fate. Head to shoulder, arm around waist, and legs tangled. Wonder when I got home, she thought. _

_Removing her head from its comfort position, she looked up at Fate, who's sleeping peacefully. Fate was just beautiful, breath-taking even in a semi-dark room. Her hand slowly trailed its way to Fate's cheek, caressing and stroking the soft baby-like skin. If only you knew how pretty you are, Nanoha thought. Slowly, her hand trials down, where it came in contact with Fate's soft lips. "And how anyone would die just to kiss these lips of yours." She mumbled._

_Kiss._

_Perhaps, it's the alcohol, she doesn't know but she felt bold. Inching up, she allowed her lips to brush up against Fate's. It was only meant to be a fast kiss, to experience how it felt. But as if it triggered her desires, she couldn't stop herself. She had longed for this, even dreamt of it. _

_Startled, she opened her eyes to look at Fate. Fate's eyes were still closed, yet she was reciprocating into the kiss, making her feel hot and excited. She wanted more. Touching Fate's bottom lip with her tongue, she was begging for entrance and was granted not long after. Fate's mouth was warmth and tasted minty from the toothbrush, Nanoha noted. _

_What seems like hours, the kiss was broken, leaving them both panting for air. Fate was now awaken and was fully aware of what just happened. None moved, none spoke, for they're afraid words will ruin this moment. Conscious or not, they both closed the distance for a second kiss. More warmth and passionate than the one before. Shyness was tossed out the window, as two tongues danced for domination, from one kiss to another._

_As her mouth was busy, her hand started wandering, caressing the curves of Fate's body. Fate's body was sculptured in perfection, she noted. It was flawless. She loves to the noises that escaped from Fate's kiss, as her hand caressed her naked thigh, slowly moving up, pulling the black lingerie up as well. It's exciting and pleasant to the ears, making her want more. God, I sound like a lecherous old man, she mentally chuckled. _

_She felt Fate tensed up a bit, as her hand reached her flat abdomen. It is smooth, flat, but firm. After minutes of attention to that area, her hand crawled up. Fate suddenly broke the kiss, head fell back as her fingers traced the outline of Fate's right breast. Giving the opportunity, she trailed kisses from the jaw line to the collar bone, as her hand work wonders on the sensitive spot, providing as much of pleasure as possible. _

_The noises were getting louder and louder as her hand was replaced with her lips. Fate was breathing fast and her body was trembling under every touch, Nanoha noticed. But she couldn't stop, couldn't control herself. It was too late to turn back now._

_That night, they both lost._

_First kiss._

_Virginity._

Too much information, Shamal concluded. Way too much. Though Shamal was amused, how Fate blamed herself for something she had never done. Forcing herself onto Nanoha?

Shamal chortled. It was definitely the opposite. Poor Fate-san.

(0)

Sitting at her desk, reading intensively was Fate Testarossa. In front of her was an opened book titled _Care of childbearing and childbearing family_. Thanks to Hayate, she was able to get some maternity books from earth. She wanted to know what's there to know about childbirth and how it affects Nanoha.

Craving.

"_It's a girl, it's a girl" she heard Shamal shouted, followed by a high-pitch cried. _

_Fate ran over to where the exhausted Nanoha lay, looking at a small doll-like baby covered in blood, crying its lungs out for the first time. It's her baby. Her baby finally came out. _

"_Here, hold it" Shamal said, handing the baby girl over to Fate after washing the blood off. _

_Blue eyes and yellow hair. A combination of Nanoha and her. _

"_Fate-chan…" _

"_Fate-chan…"_

"_FATE-CHAN!"_

_Eyes opened wide. _

"_Eh?" Fate whimpered. Looking around, she realized that it was just a dream and it was Nanoha calling her. "Yes Nanoha?"_

"_I want some apple pie" Nanoha stated in low voice._

_Fate looks confused. "Now?" she asked, peeking at her clock. "It's 4 in the morning Nanoha. Can you wait till morning?_

_Hands tugging onto Fate. Puppy eyes. Nanoha is pouting!_

"_Okay okay…I'll make you some." Fate said, rewarded with a smile from Nanoha. _

_She shuffled through the kitchen, gathering her equipments only to find one of the most essential ingredient missing. "Apple." As of this time, no places are open. _

_Hayate!_

_It didn't take long before she stood in front of the Yagami resident. She really hated to disturb them at this time of the day, but what choices did she have?_

_The person who opened the door was no other than Signum. "Do you know what time it is Testarossa?" she asked in an irritated tone._

"_I was wondering if you had any apples" _

_Signum arched an eyebrow. "Apples?"_

"_Yeah…" Fate looked apologetically for disturbing her slumber. "Nanoha wanted some apple pie, but we didn't have any apples"_

_Signum sighed. "You're hopeless." _

_After receiving the apples and bidding her thanks, she took off and flew home, only to find Nanoha in a deep slumber. Although, she was tired, she managed to bake a delicious looking pie before returning to bed. _

_And the very next day, she'd bought 10 bags of apples._

Flipping to the next page, the 'Mood Swing' topic was introduced.

"_I can do it Fate-chan." Nanoha yelled in frustration. "I'm not crippled."_

"_I know Nanoha." She stated._

"_Then stop treating me like one." Nanoha shouted back in anger. She was angry. Angry that Fate wouldn't let her do anything. Can't climb, can't run, and can't even carry anything._

"_I just don't want you to exhaust yourself." _

_Don't let Nanoha uses her magic and don't let her exhaust herself, Shamal told her. _

"_I care for you. I don't want anything to happen to you." Fate softly said, as she embraced Nanoha. "You can hit me, yell at me, and even hate me, but please take care of yourself."_

Banging her head lightly against her desk as memories of last night returned. "Nanoha…Nanoha, what am I going to do with you?"

"_No Fate-chan." Nanoha said, trembling. "No." she repeated._

"_Why not Nanoha?"_

"_I don't want you to do it because you felt responsible for it." She hissed, as trails of tear wet her cheeks._

"_I'm not do-"_

"_Please Fate. I don't want you to..." Head frantically shaking, as her body slowly slid down against the wall. _

"_It's not what you think Nanoha. I really wa-"_

"_NO" Nanoha snapped, cutting her off once again, sobbing. "Please leave me alone."_

_Fate couldn't continue. She wanted to tell Nanoha that she loved her and asking for her hand in marriage had nothing to do with responsibility. She tried to tell her, but Nanoha wouldn't listen. Perhaps, she needed time, Fate thought. _

_Turned around, she headed towards the living room where pillows and blanket awaits. Nanoha needed time to think. Perhaps, the proposal was too much of a shock. _

"_Fate-mama." A sweet angelic voice said, staring intensively at her mama. "Did Fate-mama and Nanoha-mama have a fight?"_

"_Of course not Vivio." Fate smiled, placing Vivio on her lap. _

"_Fate-mama had been…" she stopped, counting her finger one by one. "the 5__th__ time this week, Fate-mama had been sleeping on the couch."_

_Fate chuckled. "Nanoha-mama is not feeling and Fate-mama doesn't want to disturb her."_

"_It's ok Fate-mama. Vivio will let Fate-mama sleep with Vivio." Vivio said innocently. "But Fate-mama cannot hog the blanket._

**[Sir, Urgent message from Hayate Yagami]** emitted from the golden triangle device.

"Accept"

"Good Evening Chief." Fate greeted the brunette on the screen.

"As much as I hate to do this, Fate-chan, but you're our last resort." Hayate said in a serious and distressed tone.

A/N:

Somehow, I had a bit difficulty writing their interactions, so I used flashback instead. Hope it doesn't confuse you guys as much. :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

_Her knee-length hair shined brightly like fine golden threads, bound together by a single pink ribbon. Her large eyes outshined the best garnet gems, leaving people mesmerized into the pool of mysteries, Nanoha noted. She had witnessed how Fate had bloomed into a beautiful-elegant looking lady, who anyone would die for, just to capture her heart. Sending men on their knees, confessing their eternal love. and women with their jealous remarks, envious stares, and admiration. At the time, she wished to banish all those who were dared to send hungry glares towards the blonde; yes, she's very possessive but she won't admit it. Fate was hers and hers alone._

_As her eyes traveled down to Fate's lips, she was reminded how those soft, delicate lips felt upon on her own. How passionate and loving, the kisses were. She would do anything if it means to claim them once again… to claim her property. "Fate-chan…can I…" she stopped. She was afraid. She was afraid of history repeating itself. One night of pleasure traded for 2 months of separation. She'd rather drown in sorrows, then scare Fate away once again. She missed the blonde dearly._

"_Can you what?" Fate asked softly, placing her paperwork down._

_Would she risk it now? Shaking her head, she smiled. "Can I bite you?"_

_Fate arched an elegant eyebrow. Fate knew pregnancy causes craving, but cannibalism? _

"_No Fate-chan, I won't eat you…" not unless you wanted me to, she mentally added. _

_Even though it was a silly request, Fate will grant it. She always does and she always will. Releasing the pen in her hand, she extended it out to Nanoha._

_Nanoha couldn't help but giggles. Fate was silly, yet her silliness is what made her so adorable. Inflicting pain was not her intention, but since she offered, Nanoha will bite. A bite mark is better than nothing, she thought. _

"Silly Fate-chan…" Nanoha chuckled.

"What was that Nanoha-san?" Shamal questioned.

"Nothing…nothing at all."

()~()

Hands clenched tightly onto bardiche, sweat trickled down, and blood was evident from the inflicted injuries. Even with the removal of the limiter that hindered her strength, she was still no match for them. Not only was she out-numbered, those 3 are also S+ mages with power as strong as hers, if not greater.

"You don't live up to your reputation, Fate Testarossa." One of her pink haired opponents stated in amusement. "Just follow our orders and you're guaranteed survival."

"Bardiche"

**[Yes, sir]**

"Sonic drive"

()~()

"Ne Shamal, when will Fate-chan return?" Nanoha questioned.

"Soon Nanoha-san, soon. Just relax. Before you know it, Fate-san will be by your side" Shamal lied. She knew the danger in this mission, yet she had no other choice but to lie. Nanoha is reckless, especially with the love she'd harbored for the blonde, no doubt she'll use her magic to join Fate in the battle.

"_Shamal-san, please keep an eye on Nanoha." Was Fate's last request before heading off._

"Ne Shamal, what kind of mission it is?"

"It's just a simple mission, requiring Fate-san to portal an area." She lied again. If anyone would to know, they're be surprise, for Shamal had never lies and she hated herself for lying now. But it doesn't matter now, for as long as Nanoha's oblivious, she will be safe. "What do you want Nanoha-san, boy or girl?" Shamal asked, shifting to another topic.

"_Ne Fate-chan, do you want a boy or girl?" Nanoha asked, rubbing her swollen abdomen with her hand._

_Chin leaning on a pencil in her hand, Fate took a moment to think. It never really occurred to her before on which gender she prefer. "It doesn't matter Nanoha. As long as it's a healthy baby, any gender would do."_

"_hmm you're right. Either boy or girl, I want it to look like Fate-chan though."_

"_Why is that Nanoha?_

"_Because Fate-chan is hot." Nanoha winked causing Fate to blush hard. _

()~()

Down on one knee with bardiche in hand, supporting her heavy body from collapsing, Fate inhaled. Being capsulated in a magic barrier with limited oxygenated air had brought great exhaustion to her. She was having difficulty in both defense and offense, as she tried to grasp any of the remaining fresh air. The battle had been longer than what she had expected and she only managed to defeat one out of the three mages. To make things worse, she's the only one who seems to be suffocating for air, for they seems un-affected.

"Tired already, blonde?" this time, the one with long blue hair said. "Like we said, just give up and surrender. Join our team so we can start the process of cloning."

"Never…" she said coldly, biting on her lip as she endured the sharp pain on her leg. "Bardiche."

**[Yes, sir]**

"Photon lancer"

()~()

Nanoha was getting wary, as the number of soldiers entering the infirmary increased, one after another with great damages and burns. If what Shamal said were true, if it was just a simple mission, then what was the reason behind all of this?...unless Shamal was lying, she thought.

"Raising Heart."

**[Yes, master.]**

"Contact Fate Testarossa."

**[Connection failed]**

Panic and worry dominated the expression on Nanoha's face, as her mind try to process the possibilities. Fate would have answered even if she was on patrol, and Nanoha knew that. There must be something wrong and she knew it.

"Shamal, please be honest and tell me what's wrong. Where is Fate?"

()~()

Fate was out of breathe, as she yielded bardiche, transmitting blow after blow towards her opponent, only to have it blocked. Bardiche felt heavy in her hands, even her body felt heavy, interfering with her speed.

"Sonic move."

Just as she requested, Bardiche activated sonic move, temporary increasing her movement to the point where human eye could not track her. She managed to reach behind the long blue haired girl, but to her surprise, her opponent dodged her strike. Not only that, her reaction was too slow, providing her opponent the opportunity to grasp her by the collar.

"Tsk tsk…you're too slow" The girl stated as she gathered all her magic into a fist, blasting Fate straight down into the ground.

Blood leaked from the side of Fate's lips. She was too tired, her energy was drained, and her eye lids felt heavy. Her body had become so numb to the point that she no longer felt any pain.

"Nanoha" she mumbled as her eyes closed, allowing her body fall freely. She had tried her best, she really did.

Nanoha.

"_Fate-chan…" Nanoha murmured in her sleeping state. "Don't leave. Please don't leave Fate-chan." Her face grimaced; her arms tighten around Fate's waist._

_Fate smiled and her arms also tighten around Nanoha, bringing her closer. "I'll never leave you. You're my only reason to survival." Placing a lingering kiss on her forehead, she continued. "I promised. No matter what happen. I'll always be there for you."_

()~()

"Nanoha-san…" Shamal trailed, as her mind process an appropriate respond. "Just believe in-"

"Nanoha-chan…" Reinforce Zwei interrupted, in a serious tone. "Fate left something for you." She added, handing over a piece of folded paper to Nanoha. "I must go. Hayate is departing."

"Hayate is departing?" Her face was override with fear. This mission isn't just a simple mission if Hayate was getting physically involved and she knew it. "Where's Fate?"

Silence.

"Tell me the truth" She napped, hand clenching onto the letter. "Tell me…" her voice lowered into a sob

"We don't know. We lost connection with her." With that said, Zwei exited the infirmary.

Silence.

Sad, anger, fear, and betrayal were clearly conveyed in Nanoha's brown eyes, as she glared at her with teary eyes.

"Why…"

"Because it was Fate-san's last request before departure. To keep you safe, to keep you oblivious, for she knew you will summon your magic."

Turning her attention to the letter in her hand, she tentatively unfolded it. Whatever emotions that she had harbored, had now turned into nothing but anger after reading its content. Yet it made her sobbed louder, clenching the letter tightly to her chest. "Fate-chan…you idiot…idiot"

As her weeping subsided, she had come to a decision. She will not live without Fate Testarossa. A life without Fate is like a life without daylight, for Fate is her sun. Fate is her everything. Even if it means to sacrifice everything, even herself, she would comply.

"Raising Heart"

**[Yes, my master]**

"Nanoha, no!"

A/N

Yay, more flashbacks.

Thanks to Yuki from Team XTC for editing this chapter :)

Somehow when I first thought of this story, it was meant to be more of a comedy theme, but somehow along the way, it got converted into anything but that.

I'll say again, I suck at action so yea, bear with me :)

Enjoy!


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"_Fate-chan"_

"_Fate-chan"_

"_FATE-CHAN" _

_The voice was getting louder and clearer each time her name was repeatedly called. She didn't know nor can she tell who the voice belonged to. It sounded soft and sweet yet with hidden sadness and anger._

"_FATE-CHAN" _

_The voice was louder and angrier this time but she couldn't grasp the reason as she was tired, her body was numbed and her mind was gazed. All she wanted was to close her eyes, to be released by this torment yet a part of her doesn't. The anger she heard brought a sense of familiar, a sense of closeness that she could not ignored. Even with anger, the tone was warm, sending weird sensations throughout her body. And only one person she knew who can have such effects…_

"_I HATE YOU"_

_Eyes flung opened._

_Nanoha._

_At a speed she didn't know she was capable of, she flew to direction of that loving voice, seeking its beautiful owner. The injured, the cuts, and the bloods are still visible, but they no longer matter. Comparing to Nanoha, nothing mattered. Within a matter of seconds, they stood there staring at each other, mesmerizing in their lost gaze. It was evident; it was obvious; the anger, hatred, fears, sadness, and love were all visible in those teary blue eyes. Collectively, their hands move up, wanting to caress each other, to embrace each other again, but only to be separated by a barrier. _

"_Nanoha…" _

"_Fate-chan…"_

"_Please leave. It's dangerous here"_

"_I hate you Fate-chan." Nanoha murmured and continued, "You're very selfish you know that." Those mix emotions in her eyes had fled only to be left with determination. "You wouldn't possibly think I would watch you die right?" _

"_Nanoha…Please, listen to me. You need to go now. You can't summon your magic. Your body is too weak to accommodate it. You'll only inflict damage upon yourself and the baby." Her voice was spoken louder than she had intended. She didn't want to yell…but if she must, she would._

_Nanoha chuckled._

"_Fate-chan…" Standing up slowly without breaking the eyes contact, she continued, "What make you think that I would want to live without you…"_

"_Nanoha…" she mumbled as Nanoha's feet slowly rise from the ground._

"_Nanoha…" she said louder this time._

"_NANOHA…" she yelled but Nanoha wasn't going to back down, wasn't going to listen to her. Sometimes she just wishes Nanoha wasn't as stubborn as she is. _

"_I'm going to break that barrier Fate-chan. Please bear with me."_

"_Shit, Nanoha, you silly girl. You're going to hurt yourself." She cursed inwardly. I must do something or else…or else…, she thought as Nanoha continued to rise higher. Turning her attention towards her opponent, she sensed amusement flickering in their eyes. It disgusted her. She hated them. Hated them for placing her in this situation. Hated them for putting the life of a person she had treasured most on the line. She must eliminate them. And she must do it fast. For Nanoha's sake. _

"_Bardiche. Blitz Rush."_

_Nanoha, I can do it. I will do it. For you._

"_Plasma lancer" Fate yelled as a collection of energy balls appeared aiming straight at her target. _

"_Riot Zamber" _

_Upon demanded, the staff transformed into two sabre like form with a magical string at the end of each hilt connecting both of them. _

_Clash! Clash!_

_-_

_Nanoha was exhausted, from what, she wasn't sure. Perhaps the pregnancy. There was a dramatic difference in her magic power now that she's pregnant, she noted. _

"_Barrier Burst."_

_Failed. _

_Frustration. _

"_Barrier Burst"_

_Failed._

_Anger. _

_[Fate!] tone covered with concern even in telepathy, as her eyes take in the view of Fate's body coming in contact with the hard ground, forcefully._

_[I'm alright Nanoha]_

_Eyes closed, hands clenched tightly around the staff, summoning all the power within her body, occluding it at the tip of her staff forming a still-growing power ball._

_You can't die Fate-chan. I haven't given you permission yet._

"_Starlight break-"_

_Her command was cut off as her hand immigrated to her stomach, clenching tightly onto her uniform. It hurts. It was excruciating. It was her baby calling out for her. For her to stop, for her baby was also in pain._

"_I'm sorry…But I must do this. Please forgive my selfishness." She mumbled softly, giving it one last gentle rub before placing her hand back to its earlier position, ignoring the pain, physically and emotionally. "Please forgive mama…" _

"_Starlight…breaker…"as a single tear rolls down her cheeks._

"_Nanoha…NO!"_

Her red eyes flung opened, her heartbeat was rapid, and her breathing was deep and shallow.

_Infirmary_, she noted as her eyes scanned the surroundings only to stop at the occupied bed not far from her. It was no other than Nanoha who occupied the space unconsciously. _Her Nanoha_.

Abruptly, she jumped off the bed ignoring her head-throbbing pain and her ached body, heading to the person she loved most.

Fate smiled.

Nanoha was alive and breathing as she observed the rise and fall of her breathing. No bandages, no cuts, and no burns. Everything was fine. Nanoha was fine. The baby was...

_Oh god, please no._ Tentatively, she placed a hand on Nanoha's now flat stomach. It was no longer distended; no longer have its lovely oval shape that Nanoha always complain of.

"_Do I look fat Fate-chan?" Nanoha asked, observing herself in front of a long mirror in their room. It has been almost 3 months now that she had been pregnant and the fetal had emigrated from the pelvic area, making it more visible to the naked eyes. _

"_No you don't, Nanoha" Fate assured her in amusement. _

"_Did you know that I no longer can fit into my uniform anymore?"_

"_Well…that's understandable, it is not?"_

"_So I do look fat!" _

"…"

"I'm sorry..." her voice was low, filled with pain and guilt. "I'm sorry..." she repeated again as her eyes threaten to release those trapped tears. She'd blamed herself for her weakness, for her failure, and for the pain she had inflicted on her beloved. If only she was _stronger_, then this won't happen. If only she didn't _exist_, the pain would never appear.

Even with all the complaints, she knew Nanoha loved her unborn. It might be an accident, might be unexpected, but they both learned to accept it and came to love it for the same unspoken reason, _love_.

"_I don't think you can hear anything yet Fate-chan" Nanoha beamed as her fingers stroked the blonde's hair gently. She love this position, love the skin contact, but she especially love being in the blonde's tone arms. _

_Ear to belly, Fate listened attentively. Nanoha was right, she couldn't hear anything. "Yes, I can. She said 'Hi Fate-mama' just now." She joked._

"_She eh?" she replied in amusement. Fate was cute before, but now, for some unknown reason, she was unbelievably cuter._

"_Yup. Her voice was loud and bossy just like her Nanoha-mama." Fate teased._

"_Mou…Fate-chan" Moving her hand, her intention was to playfully slap Fate's, only to ended up being caught and captured in a firm hold. Fate was very playfully tonight, very flirty in a way also, she noted, as she felt continuous loving strokes. _

"_Then what would you like to name her Fate-chan?"_

"_Hmm" she hummed as her mind pondered. "I don't know Nanoha. I'm not really good with names. What do you have on mind?"_

"_Well…I have been giving it some thought. What do you think of 'Ai', Fate-chan?" Ai might sound plain to some, might sound too simple for others, but to Nanoha, it was the best name. Ai means love, symbolizing the love they both hid. _

"_Ai. Ai Takamachi." Fate like always was oblivious to any give hidden message but it didn't stop her from loving the name. "Did you hear? Your name is Ai now." She spoke softly in a joyous tone to her unborn baby. "Let us fly together ne, when you're born. With Nanoha-mama and Vivio."_

"_Silly Fate-chan." _

Fate didn't know when the tears in her eyes escaped creating a damp spot on the white blanket and she didn't care. The rage and self-loathed have pushed all emotions aside. She'd failed at protecting those she loved and had failed miserably in the role of a parent, the child she'd failed to keep safe.

She needed to get out. To release the anger and the hatred on no one but herself.

_If only she never existed._

Rose to her feet, she turned around to leave. Destination, unknown; somewhere, anywhere she can't cause pain.

"Please…" the person who caught her wrist spoke lowly, lacking the energy. "Don't go…"

"I'm sorry Nanoha…" she apologized again now to the conscious Nanoha. "If I don't go…I'll..." she couldn't continue. Hands clenched into a fist, eyes closed, and words trapped. She felt like she will explode or suffer from some kind of mental breakout. _Anywhere but here._

"You'll…only hurt me." Tighten the hold around the wrist, she continued, "If you go."

The voice was merely a whispered, but Fate heard it, nice and clear, which confused her. "Why…"

Tugging on the hand, she pulled Fate back, facing her. "Because if you go…" guiding Fate's hand in her own to her left chest, atop her beating heart. "My heart will stop beating."

_More tears. _

Pulling Fate down for a comforting embrace, which she noted was helpful, as Fate relaxed herself. "I was the one who made the selfish decision. I was told of the possible outcome…but I…" she sighed, placing a lingering kiss on Fate's temple. "I don't think I'm strong enough…to live a life without you. It hurts a lot just thinking of it."

"Nanoha…"

"Please listen, Fate-chan. Please don't blame yourself. Please understand that I, Nanoha Takamachi, will give up anything, everything to see you alive, even if it cost my _life_." Placing another kiss on her forehead, she tightened her arms around Fate's slender waist. She was sad. She was devastated but she must remain strong. Fate needed her just as much as she needed Fate. No doubt, it had left an unforgettable scar but they will face it _together_, will overcome it _together_.

"I wouldn't want to survive, if it cost you your live…"

"Is that a confession?" she lightly teased, attempting to change the mood. _It was overall, the correct decision._ To have Fate in her arms; yes it was a selfish decision. "You know Fate-chan…we can always make more."

Face flushed, eyes widened. "W-we…c-can?" she stuttered in embarrassment.

_So cute. So right._ "Can we?"

"I-if…th-that's..wha-what you want." More stuttering.

"I want. I want…_ten_." Nanoha laughed.

"…"

"I love you Fate-chan."

"I love you too Nanoha."

Those words were like magic, transmitting a tremendous amount of warmth and love throughout her body. Those words sounded so sweet, so loving, and so pleasant to the ears, putting the letter Fate left behind in shame.

_I Love You_

_- Fate Testarossa_

_.  
_

A/N:

Sorry for the late update. Exams took most of my time.

Should I end the story here? It does seem like the perfect ending I think. What do you guys think?

Hope you guys enjoy it :)


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